a brief introduction to my family

the following is an email exchange between me, my mother and my father over what to get my father's great-aunt for her birthday. my father signs his emails "L P/D" to indicate "Love, Peter/Daddy" while my mother, barbara, opts for "b/m xxx". this last statement is completely anecdotal. it just makes me laugh.

Father: is this of interest for Ida? A big strange, but rather unique.


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Me: or we could just get her this:



Mother: your scottish blood is showing itself again!

Father: actually, it could also be termed Swabian.

Me: is that a fancy word for "cheap jew" you RACIST??

Father: there are a few ideas on www.netique.com.

Me: what if we got her a certificate to a nice restaurant in the city?

Mother: i like that idea as she likes to go out with her friends. they liked that one french place they took us to on Geary. what about that?

Father: one thing to remember: they really do not like to go at night very much anymore - we drove them that night to the french restaurant. i will fall into line (as always) but we might want to find something a little different or unique - the netique.com website is interesting.

Me: 1. netique should be called antique. you might as well buy her a headstone.
2. some restaurants do this crazy thing where they serve food during the day. i know. it's weird.

Father: I spoke to the restaurant and they sell gift certificates but they will not do it over the phone because they seem to have had some issues in the past. An idea: if you ladies are free Fri, Sat or Sun night of Labor Day weekend, why don't Mummy and i take you to dinner there and we can collect the gift certificate at the same time?

Mother: The girls are off to Monterey, but i'll go to dinner with you P.

Me: gross, guys. get a room.